Someone tell me why...

Adults always assume that they are right when they know they are wrong?
Why adults are such a pain in the butt
Why they are holes in the butt (read in between the lines?)

Sigh I was just thinking about this whole thing. I am not really angry or hurt.
Just irritated, irritated that at this age, at my age and at my parents age..
They still don't understand me or attempt to, it's like they still treat me the same way as they did when I was younger.

Like what the feces. Seriously. Aren't I of age?

I really am feeling pretty much immune to it though. It's not like getting angry would solve the problems. I figured that they are just too much of an irritant in my life.

But I need these irritants, they support my very life too, how ironic.
They spoil it and make it... So much irony in the house.

Sigh, I really wish I could be a full-fledged adult.
Maybe I don't want it, maybe all I want is my freedom but still being underneath the wings of my parents, someone to clear up my messes...

I know how that feels... It's great ain it. Sigh, I just feel so troubled now. Sickening.

I won't blog again, I'm irritated and angry that I am forced to being treated like that. I feel violence rushing in my blood, oh yes.

Sigh. -_______-...

I hate being someone else whom I am not.
And if you don't like me, I am not obliged to make you like me.

And don't influence anyone of my friends you idiot.
And friends, don't be so fickle minded by someone who doesn't like me.

Sigh, I really give up. I give up being someone I am not.
I am nice at times and I have my moods at times.
I am not born in this world to please you neither are you to please me.

We are all not perfect beings and if you think I'm too nagging or my ways are mean then hey! That's me, you have no right to judge me or whatsoever.

As for a particular person I would like to swear at you and curse you because you really are the worst thing ever. You have no backbone you only support everyone else whom you want to please you dont care about people who care about you.
YOU ONLY CARE ABOUT WHO YOU WANT TO PLEASE. THAT'S ALL YOU EVER DO.
SO F YOU. I HATE YOU. AND GET OUT OF MY LIFE.
BECAUSE YOU ARE ONLY MAKING HELL A PLACE ON EARTH.

F OFF. AND THANK YOU.

Finally got that off my chest.

Today was supposedly an okay day really.
Until, you guys just read it.
Well, laughter in the daytime with all the fun things.
Went shopping too. Sigh. I can't blog now. Too hurt and angry.
Sorry for the post, had to vent it out somewhere before i go mad.

You know what, scratch that, I've lost all my marbles.

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I think I am getting obsessed with this ---> ♥

Anyway, NEW BLOG SKIN! Yeah well the old one was a little looney haha.
Okay stuff to put here.

I want my scholarship. I want my nose. I want my debating trophy but I don't want overdose.

Sigh, I know I'm nuts but I think I want to keep this short.

Then putting reality aside, I want to do all the wackiest things that I could ever do in my life. Totally change my hair, change my hairstyle, learn to play musical instruments, have a band, throw a gig, compose songs, drink, party, club, be the teenager I am meant to be. Go for expensive shopping spree. Work my ass off for money for that of course. I want boots, clothes, everything and anything I can get. Go for language classes. Learn French, German, Spanish, whatever I can learn, travel the world and finally, I want to marry and settle down in a family, hopefully I'll live in somewhere nicer to die in. Like the countryside.

With all the ♥ in the world, my little nose, you are the brightest star for me.
I♥you.

People whom I♥:
Nose.

Church people: Cellgroup; karmen, michelle, yiying, vic, janel
Lunch sweethearts; Vic, Joel, Jerry

Debaters: You guys are so rocking; Aji [coach]
[seniors] Pacer, Paki, Tank, Bhavna, Canni, Scarro, Khandahar, Porkie, Saydu?
[everyone else] KJ, Freya, Maryann, Beanie, Nea, Yat, Ray, Ekta, Sunshine, Blob, Don,
Anita, Irene, Box, R2, R1, Hawaii... did I miss anyone out?

GEMS 1BO2! ♥♥♥♥♥: (I copied and paste) Brian, Christianna, Farah, Fuhairah, Shu Han, Grace, Kesha, Derek, Anne, Dai Zhen, Crystal, Heather, Nisa, Zakiyyah, Hazimah, Hui Yin, Reuben, Pamela, Max, Li Cheng, Virina, Megan, Yong Xuan, Zabeen.

Lol, I only know a few people from the other class, 1B01 and they are YiWei and Uncle Josee, Kylie and Ruoen. I♥them too.

Some other people I think I should mention that I♥: JAMIE! COUSIN! PLMC's Vocalists ministry, band, sound crew, ushers. There are so many....

And to all of you, I♥you guys. :)

I hope I didn't miss out anyone else important. If I missed you out, I'll let you know that whoever you are, you are still loved. :)

xoxoxoxo means hugs&kisses!

I can't believe it. I'm blogging. -.-

Today is the first day that I didn't go to school in my poly days.
I thought I loved school, but seeing what has happened, it makes me think that I am really better off alone.

I won't say it's emoness I just think that I'm the bad clam that can't click with everyone.

And I find myself too stubborn to succumb to others and what they want.
I often find myself asking, who are you now? What are you doing? Is this justice enough on your own conscious?

I want to be myself too much really.

So when I thought about today and how much I wanted to go to school, I realised that I want to do the same thing you want to do, Daddy.
I want to give up on reality as a whole, lost myself. Go against the Singapore Government, go against what I know. Like how we must go to school, we must study to get good grades, how I must be a good girl, what society expects from me.

And I was just thinking about all those other people in the world, who don't face being in a democractic "civilised" society, don't suffer the expectations that they have to meet that we do.

It's not just. But i guess it all boils down to it, being life itself. We're born into this world and society.

So today, when I was at home, besides feeling the stress from my nose, medicine and the notes that were facing me, I realised that I took not only a day off in school or made full use of my MC or missed a BNF test. I also realised that I took a break from life altogether.

Duckie, will keep fighting on. She needs it. She will fight her own battles, cry her won tears, experience her own willpower and strength. She needs to keep moving on..

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